The Sci-Fi Channel: the first three months

The Sci-Fi Channel claims to be “all things science fiction.” With Paramount and Universal Studios behind it, we should be seeing a great range of sf, from Star Trek to the latest films and in America it has a great schedule. Unfortunately, in the UK the popular sf shows have already been snapped up by Sky One (Star Trek, TNG and Voyager, VR 5, Nowhere Man, Earth 2...), with classic and cult series on Bravo (The Prisoner, Space 1999 and, sadly, Automan) and UK Gold (Dr Who).

So what is there on the Sci-Fi Channel? In the morning there are cartoons like The Bionic Six, where giant frogs, Dr Scarab and the bionic Bennett Family battle to the death (or at least the gratuitous pun). This is followed by the barely animated Space Angel with real mouths speaking in painted faces producing a very disconcerting effect as the professor, his manly assistant and his beautiful daughter come to the rescue. You can also see Robotech, G-Force (that’s Battle Of The Planets minus the annoying 7-Zark-7) and Galaxy Rangers. We haven’t seen any original manga anime or any of the newer surreal cartoons like The Maxx (try MTV instead).

There’s a vast number of sf films out there, but judging by the Sci-Fi Channel the out and out classics are Alien and Star Trek II, the Wrath of Khan. Both of these have been on at least six times in the three months since the channel started up in Europe. This wouldn’t be so bad if there were plenty of other films on as well, but there aren’t. The same film is usually on two or three times in one day but what they often don’t tell you is that while the first showing (about 6 or 8pm) is usually the cut-for-TV or censored-for-America version, the second or third showing that night may well be the widescreen version or the director’s cut. There’s no way to find out which is which apart from the occasional announcement at the end of the first showing, when you’ve already seen it once. The Sci-Fi Channel has shown some rare prints of films, but without any way for viewers to find out they’re going to be on, which is a terrible waste. Typically, however, the films are titles like The Philadelphia Experiment, Creepshow 2 and Tarantula or the Quatermass movies - interesting but neither a compelling nor a comprehensive selection.

Much of the schedule is taken up by series ranging from classic to crass - but not Star Trek, Quantum Leap or the X Files. Completists will enjoy Captain Power - JMS’ first TV series, featuring cyber-warriors complete with flashing chest panels (originally shown with adverts suggesting that you buy the gun and shoot them yourself) oppressing the helpless masses on a post-holocaust Earth. It’s noteworthy for its pioneering but now dated computer graphics. Even stranger is Jupiter Moon (a cross between Neighbours, Prisoner Cell Block H and the Chalet School in space) or for real soap fans there’s the spooky Dark Secrets. More familiar are The Bionic Woman followed by the Six Million Dollar Man, Return to the Planet of the Apes and Battlestar Galactica, plus Swamp Thing, Lost in Space and Knightmare. There are plenty of anthology shows like Ray Bradbury Theatre, Friday the 13th The Series, the original Outer Limits, Rod Sterling’s Night Gallery and even Alfred Hitchcock Presents!

It’s good to see The Night Stalker, the story of a paranormal investigative journalist that was a major influence on the X Files, and made-for-TV series like The Martian Chronicles and Space. Space enthusiasts will enjoy NASA Watch and Inside Space which cover the science, history and development of space flight. We’re not quite sure what to make of Patrick Macnee’s Mysteries Magic and Miracles series however - we think Steed would have beaten the alien invaders aside with his umbrella.

In between the mysterious tales and next week’s exciting episode are some interesting shorts. You can see sf animations, including MIT’s killer cockroach in Grinning Evil Death. This is a true digital actor, an AI cockroach that moves independently. There are talking head sound bites of Arthur C Clarke on space travel and space research and various Star Trek stars and directors with some fascinating snippets about the making of the films but these are repeated a little too often. Also good is the FTL Newsfeed, daily news from the future that regales us with reports on the expedition to Europa’s frozen crust and an AI computer that wants a human body.

There are plenty of ad breaks, for example between the introduction and the opening credits and again between the end of a show and the closing credits as well as two or three breaks within a one hour show but a lot of the time there aren’t any adverts, just trailers and teasing montages of clips from sf films and series. If all the shows and films in the montages were on the Sci-Fi Channel regularly (as in the US), it would be an excellent channel. As it is it just leaves us wanting more and changing the channel. If you’re watching on satellite rather than cable, it’s even more disappointing as Sky only shows four hours a day, from 1am to 4am, which gives you Swamp Thing, Battlestar Galactica or Friday 13th the Series and sometimes a movie. There are some better programmes scheduled for this slot later this year, like a documentary on the making of Species, but no major new series yet.

There’s some great sf on TV these days, particularly on cable and satellite. Unfortunately most of it isn’t on the Sci-Fi Channel. You get lots of rubber alien suits, silver saucers on string, trashy 70’s American TV series and black and white 50’s films but if you want Star Trek, classic British sf like Dr Who and Space 1999 or good films try Sky One, Bravo, UK Gold or even the BBC. All things science fiction? We think not.